I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
