Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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