well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
