The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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