We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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