So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
