Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You are a genius and a whore.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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