i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
