Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
So vagazzling was a success
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
