I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize