Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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