I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
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