Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
