i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I don't think brook has ever known best
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
