That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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