In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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