I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Randomize
