we have pet lesbian snakes
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
