Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize