wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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