Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
