Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
