Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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