Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
