She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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