But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
