I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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