glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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