The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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