Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
