these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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