I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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