trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
