summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
