That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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