Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize