Walk of Shame. In a state park.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
