Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
