Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
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