people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
