I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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