carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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