I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
this boner is exhausting
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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