Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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