I am puke
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
did you just send me my own nude
How does one acquire holy water?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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