Dual....:-)
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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