she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
50% drunk capacity currently
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You did what with his pubic hair?
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