got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
