So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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