Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
