Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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